The Eel part 1

You were a sharpened knife

Ready to carve

Short and quick

Coward to the bone  

 At devil’s reach

 I became raw meat

Burst of cries and lies

An eel came to kiss me

I raided the closet

Never to return

I drove home once

Accidentally

I sat on a park bench

Transiently 

Craving for your warmth

I circled the mirage

Like a hawk

The ocean

You once or never were?

Five years too late

Your love letters mean nothing, asshole

Too coward to ever love 

Love yourself, will you?

 

Lost and delusional

I ended up among the steel birds

Where the sentimentalists

Made the ‘port  home.

The ordinary became obsolete

The 9 to 5 non-existent

Broken dreams became distant

The world was ours

Whenever we wanted it to be

Minds emptied

We rejected the shattered glass

The fortune cookie that fed us lies

The monopoly that told us who to be

And good souls we were

All of us,

For a moment

For a short time

Perhaps a lifetime

And good souls suffer fast

The picture of your daughter

In your wallet

Your happy demeanour

But your empty heart

The very same daughter

You were banned to see forever

We never fucked, thankfully

I knew it’d be loveless anyway

I won’t forget our fight

In our small hotel room

Our bodies touching

In the miniature bed we shared 

In Osaka.

Thought I’d see the chair flying

Only your temper came knocking 

Your father had passed

I pushed your buttons

Travel made us richer

But we couldn’t stand each other

And you, friend,

The disturbed mind of a poet

You mumbled out death

I screamed out life

And we formed a bond

Incomprehensible to this day.

You make no sense

Ever

But I’ll still be there 

At the Ship 

With a pint of something 

While you mix your usual beer-cola

What’s it taste like anyway? 

And then at dusk,

Our demons met our angels

I listened to your soul speak

On lonely nights 

with no travellers

Loud and belligerent you were

You lived fast 

and you might die young

But it didn’t matter

Because you lived for today

And didn’t care what they’d say

She married another,

I don’t think you ever recovered 

I’ll go for a drink , sure,

But what’s the point anyway?

Don’t I still remind you of her?

And you C,

You ran away from the isle

Death left you breathless 

You tasted the west coast first

And ended up breathing the mountain air

You get me, I get you

We don’t need a translator 

We communicate borderline telepathically

Don’t let another fool you, friend

You deserve the moon and you know it

One night on the road,

I blacked out

A freak accident

Shattered my skull

I drank at Jame’s Beach

Unknowingly 

My mind became fuzzy

My emotions amplified

I screamed nonsense

The blow was more severe than it appeared to be

A manager tried to fire me

For the “invisible” injury

And I loathe him to this day

For causing me more pain

Than my body could handle

You disgust me.

They say,

Forgive those that are not sorry

Well, I’m not sorry

And I’m not forgiven 

But nobody cares

The eel came to kiss me

That night again

When I met you

At a party

A curse you were and still are

Go away, leave me alone

I’m squinting real hard 

To see the meaning in you

I don’t see it

I see your pale face

My body goes into shock 

People believed your lies

The abuser hides well

Behind his innocent charm

Don’t believe it.

But you were all fooled

And I’m the “crazy” one, of course

And I fooled myself

The gut knew

But I didn’t listen

It wasn’t really a blow, my “friend” had said

It doesn’t count!

Every scream , every push, 

every “I didn’t mean to” hit you there, every lie, 

Every mind fucked

Twisted manipulation 

It all counts, dammit!

I won’t forget your screams 

When I had my concussion

You fucking animal

But no, you were “helping” me

And I should thank you

Take your shit and go

Ironically, the nice cop said 

“Go home”

And you stayed and smoked weed all day

With our good for nothing roommate

I ended up cleaning the dirtied walls

Because you were too lazy.

Lucky me. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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